BREAKING: Newsom declares state of emergency after Russia destroys several California cities
SACRAMENTO—The Russian offensive in Ukraine has spread to California as several cities have been utterly destroyed. California Governor Gavin Newsom...
Gavin Newsom
BREAKING: VP Kamala Harris dispatched to Europe to ‘sleep with anyone I need to to resolve Ukraine crisis’
WASHINGTON, DC—US Vice President Kamala Harris is traveling to a NATO meeting in Munich, Germany Thursday to "sleep with anyone I need...
Newsom mandates a 10k-seat ‘Looters Section’ at Superbowl LVI
LOS ANGELES—Spectators paying upwards of $10,000 (yes, you read that right) to watch the LA Rams and Cincinnati Bengals slug...
Newsom tackles LA train looting crisis by making cute little BLM sculpture from leftover trash
LOS ANGELES—California Governor Gavin Newsom turned lemons into lemonade today by creating a fun little "Black Lives Matter" sculpture out...
Count Chocula endorses Gavin Newsom for 2024 presidential run
SACRAMENTO—Is Governor Gavin Newsom throwing his hat in the ring for the 2024 presidential election? We don’t know the answer...
Gov. Newsom named U-Haul’s #1 salesman of 2021
SACRAMENTO—California Governor Gavin Newsom is racking up the awards. For the first time this year, Newsom has been named U-Haul’s number...
Time accidentally names African-American Elon Musk ‘Person of the Year’ because they thought he was black
NEW YORK—Time Magazine has issued an apology for selecting the South African-American Elon Musk as its "Person of the Year"...
California law mandates stores carry ‘My Little Communist’ action figures
SACREMENTO, CA—Governor Gavin Newsom signed into law a mandate that requires all stores sell a gender-neutral "My Little Communist" action...
BREAKING: California legalizes needle rape for K-12 schools
SACRAMENTO—California on Friday became the first state to legalize needle rape for all public and private schoolchildren, a move affecting...
BREAKING: Fox News calls tomorrow’s California recall election for Gavin Newsom
SACRAMENTO—Fox News has officially called tomorrow's California recall election for Governor Gavin Newsom hours before in-person voting has begun. After...
