Coca-Cola now requiring employees to ‘be less white’ by wearing blackface
ATLANTA—Super woke soft drink company Coca-Cola is now mandating all employees to wear blackface in order to "be less white"....
Year: 2021
In effort to win over media, Ted Cruz starts putting COVID patients in nursing homes
AUSTIN—Senator Ted Cruz (R-TX) who was criticized for not personally fixing all of the telephone and cables during the snowstorm...
Biden is giving up chocolate-covered kids for Lent
WASHINGTON, DC—White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki reiterated President Joe Biden's devout Catholicism today confirming that he has given up...
In effort to woo Trump voters, Biden tries new hairdo
WASHINGTON, DC—In an effort to understand and woo Trump supporters, Dominion-select President Joe Biden is trying a new hairdo. "I...
BREAKING: Biden deports all Republicans to Cancún
WASHINGTON, DC—In response to the Ted Cruz scandal plaguing the nation, President Biden signed an executive order deporting all Republicans...
Cuomo to legalize marijuana, sports betting, and killing lots of elderly by accident
NEW YORK—In an effort to shore up dwindling support, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo announced he will be introducing new...
AOC recommends increasing cow farts to warm Texas up
WASHINGTON, DC—Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) made a bold suggestion for Texans experiencing unprecedented cooling caused by global warming: more cow...
BREAKING: President playing games while Americans die is heartwarming now
(CNN) Americans are dying at unprecedented levels from that scary disease. But now and for the foreseeable future, any time...
Green New Deal support increases among the Amish after green energy fail
ANDOVER, OH—As millions of Americans lose power provided by Green New Deal compliant energy sources, support for the bill among...
