BREAKING: Time gives 10% of Zelensky’s Person of the Year award to ‘the Big Guy’
Time magazine named Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky 2022's "Person of the Year" on Wednesday, but made sure to clarify that...
Year: 2022
How to Play Off Accidentally Posting Satire as an Actual Headline
Did you eat the Onion? Get stung by the Bee? It's understandable with actual news headlines so ridiculous that it's...
BREAKING: Elon Musk offers to buy the FBI from the Clintons for $66 billion
US—Elon Musk has launched a $66 billion bid to buy the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI), saying the proposed deal...
Treason’s Greetings from the Bidens!
"From our family to yours, we wish everyone treason's greetings. May your holidays be filled with the peace and joy...
Elon Musk sets new world record for not killing himself after revealing Deep State censorship
US—Last month Genesius Times, and News That Matters heralded Elon Musk's new world record for not killing himself after publicly...
Democrats pass law making home invaders announce they are burglars before robbing you
US—Democrats struggling to shake the "light on crime" stigma have passed a sweeping crime reform bill. The new bill, which...
Biden promotes non-binary Brinton to head TSA citing experience stealing women’s luggage
WASHINGTON, DC—A non-binary Biden administration official nuclear waste expert was charged with stealing a traveler’s luggage from the Minneapolis airport...
BREAKING: CIA flubs pathetic assassination attempt on Biden
US—The CIA are getting very rusty. Their pathetic assassination attempt to take out President* Biden ended with five burnt SUVs...
FBI Concerned About Outbreak of Free Speech on Twitter
There’s been an explosion of free speech on Twitter since Musk bought the company, and that has the FBI very...
BREAKING: Ukraine asks for another $41B in aid to fund an audit of the previous $92B in aid
KYIV—Ukrainian Volodymyr Zelensky has asked the United States for an additional $41 billion in aid to pay for an audit...
