BREAKING: Biden officially changes his name to Cho Bei Den
WASHINGTON DC—Feeling that the election is behind him, Joe Biden has sold the naming rights to the president of the...
Business
Nike launches Antifa Spirit Urban Gear just in time for Black Friday
BEAVERTON, OR--Athletic equipment maker Nike has launched its Antifa Spirit Gear just in time for Black Friday. Nike spokesperson, William...
Hunter Biden surfaces after hearing someone say ‘I’m going to release the crack!’
WASHINGTON DC—Austere businessman and philanthropist Hunter Biden has finally surfaced in Washington DC after hearing someone say she was going...
Woman with ‘My Body My Choice’ shirt screams at people choosing to not wear masks
A woman with a "My Body My Choice" shirt has been stationed at a local park screaming at selfish people...
Twitter starts defending election fraud as ‘good for democracy’ after they can’t ignore it anymore
SAN FRANCISCO—Social media giant Twitter has started defending election fraud in their "context" notices after it became obvious that they...
Trump supporters loot and pillage local Walmart after Biden declared winner
SHEBOYGAN, WI--Racist supporters of President Donald Trump descended on a local Walmart to loot and pillage in protest of Democratic...
Biden to ‘start a war or two’ in first 100 days to keep CNN, MSNBC employed
Joe Biden assured the mainstream media, in order to avoid a ‘night of a thousand pink slips’ he will, in...
Girl Scouts release ‘Clump of Ingredients’ cookies to make up for Barrett tweet
NEW YORK—Girl Scouts of America kicked up a firestorm of criticism by publishing a tweet congratulating the fifth female Supreme...
Ukraine treasury honors Joe Biden with a “zero cents” coin
KIEV—Ukraine has honored the US Democratic presidential nominee with an official Joe Biden coin in support of the candidate through...
Coconut-picking monkeys riot COSTCO after PETA forces thousands of job losses
BANGKOK--Monkeys in major Thai cities turned to rioting after PETA pressure on retailers forces thousands into joblessness and poverty. A...
