Elon Musk needs to stop doing amazing things because it’s making us gender studies triple-doctorates feel worthless 
BREAKING: Trump considering replacing Federal Reserve with much more reliable Magic 8 Ball 
BREAKING: Dems cheer Laken Riley’s murder As ‘A very, very late term abortion’ 
White House: Nuclear Armageddon was always a key part of Biden’s ‘Build Back Better’ agenda 
Transwomen complain about uniforms crushing their balls during dominating performance 
Taylor Swift is growing out her mustache and armpit hair until Trump is taken off the 2024 ballot
NEW YORK—In a bold move, pop sensation Taylor Swift has announced that she will not shave her mustache or armpit...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
Former California Dem-turned-Rep switches back after sex scandal, ‘All is forgiven’
In a surprising turn of events, California State Senator Marie Alvarado-Gil has returned to the Democratic Party after facing a...
If you don’t want your pets stolen and eaten by immigrants, you may be a racist homophobe bigot
There’s a new form of bigotry taking root in this country—one that’s just as insidious as anything we’ve seen before....
AOC hosts ‘Cooking with Communism’, shows you how to cook your pets
The new smash hit social video show "Cooking with Communism" stars democratic socialist Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who takes questions while...
BREAKING: Cheney starts ‘Dicks for Harris’ group
former Vice President and celebrated Halliburton mascot, Dick Cheney, has launched a new political action group called "Dicks for Harris,"...
NFL to expand diversity and inclusion by holding one Super Bowl for Blacks and another for Whites
In a groundbreaking move aimed at promoting diversity and inclusivity, the National Football League (NFL) has announced plans to host...
Kamala Harris orders Secret Service to use only NERF guns from now on
WASHINGTON, DC—Call her a power-hungry prostitute or a tyrannical communist, but you cannot call President Vice-President Kamala Harris a hypocrite...
BREAKING: DOJ warns Russia ‘do not interfere with our interference of our elections’
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a rare moment of transparency, Attorney General Merrick Garland issued a stern warning to Russia to...
BREAKING: Armed Venezuelan gangs set up Harris-Walz campaign office in Denver apartment complex
DENVER, CO – In a surprising twist on grassroots campaigning, armed Venezuelan gangs have taken the initiative to open a...
HEARTFELT: Kamala’s Nieces Help DNC Pronounce Names of All the Black Prisoners She Kept for Labor
WASHINGTON, D.C. – In what is being hailed as a touching moment of family unity and political correctness, Kamala Harris’s...
