AOC demands Black Friday be renamed ‘Friday of Color’ 
Donald Trump picks Elizabeth Warren to head Bureau of Indian Affairs 
Outgoing Transportation Sec. Pete Buttigieg taps P. Diddy for mission to destroy Uranus 
BREAKING: Biden Sneaks in Pardon for Hunter During Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony 
Farewell, X: Why I’m Leaving Over Their Refusal to Censor Me 
Biden to keep troops in DC forever to make sure it doesn’t look like a military coup
WASHINGTON, DC—Josef Stealin Biden will keep the National Guard troops stationed around the nation's capital there until March in order...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
POLL: Most people unimpressed with their 2-week free trial of the New World Order
A poll conducted by the Pew Pew Institute shows that a majority of Americans are unimpressed with their 2-week free...
Greta Thunberg wins Nobel Prize for her role in Black Lives Matter
STOCKHOLM—The Nobel Committee has proven that they are not racist by giving the Nobel Peace Prize to Greta Thunberg for...
AOC claims Starbucks tried to kill her by misspelling her name on her to-go coffee
WASHINGTON, DC—US Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) is living a nightmare in the hellscape that is the nation's capital. Not only...
Walmart now offering free COVID anal swabs before shopping
BENTONVILLE, AR—In the interest of making the shopping experience for everyone as safe as can be, Walmart Supercenters will now...
Local girls HS team gets new recruit after Biden signs trans rights executive order
The local girls high school basketball team got a surprise new recruit following President Biden's new transgender rights executive order...
OAN adds TDS counter to broadcast
Media outlet OAN updated their on-screen graphics to display the number of America's most devastating disease, TDS.Trump derangement syndrome is...
Biden to White House Press Corps: ‘If you question me, you ain’t a journalist’
WASHINGTON, DC—President Joe Biden gave a speech today about the importance of objective reporting in a democratic society, and how...
Nadler says 2 or 3 sets of underwear are safer
WASHINGTON, DC—Representative Jerry Nadler (D-NY) now agrees with the CDC that two or three sets of underwear are safer in...
