Gates says he will release a deadlier virus if people don’t take his first one seriously enough
SEATTLE—Tech founder and worldwide supervillain Bill Gates says that he will "release a deadlier virus" if people don't take his...
Business
BREAKING: Ellen DeGeneres dies at 62 from complications of cancel culture
HOLLYWOOD—Talkshow host and everyone's favorite daytime lesbian, Ellen DeGeneres has died at the age of 52 from complications of cancel...
OnlyFans girl can’t figure out why she isn’t married
LOS ANGELES- Speaking to reporters over webcam, professional OnlyFans cam girl Sadie Atwood discussed her romantic life outside of work....
Clinton: ‘I did not have sexual relations with that plane’
Former President Bill Clinton denied knowing anything about the “terrible crimes” allegedly committed by billionaire financier Jeffrey Epstein. In a...
New ‘Corona Karen’ Barbie yells at dolls without masks
Mattel is getting into the COVID-19 political fray with a new "Corona Karen" Barbie doll. The new doll line has...
NBA to replace ‘all that basketball stuff’ with a 60-minute virtue signaling competition
ORLANDO—The NBA season is set to resume next week in Orlando, Florida, and the league’s court is ready for what...
All 6 fans of the WNBA are infuriated players walked off the court during national anthem
The Seattle Storm and New York Liberty, walked off the court during the playing of the national anthem prior to...
Washington’s NFL franchise will now be called the ________ _____s so as not to offend anyone
Effective immediately, Washington will call itself the __________ _______s so as not to offend anyone. "We had a few ideas...
BLM rejects Marxism once they find out Karl Marx was an old white guy
By now every sentient being is well aware that Black Lives Matter has absolutely nothing to do with Black lives....
Feminists protest National Hotdog Day in order to defeat the Patriarchy
CHICAGO—A group of 100 feminists marched defiantly outside Vienna Beef headquarters today, in order to protest national hotdog day, July...
