BREAKING: Trump finishes insurrection started 4 years ago by becoming president again 
BREAKING: Biden issues comprehensive list of everyone involved in federal crimes 
BREAKING: AOC claims she was nearly raped by Trump’s inauguration ceremony 
BREAKING: Biden pardons several ‘totally innocent’ people for crimes they didn’t commit 
BREAKING: Biden pardons all criminals except cute old grandma who waved flag in Capitol Jan 6 
China recommends US remain closed until they can afford to buy it on eBay
Though nobody believes China has vanquished the virus, it looks like they are back open for business. Productivity seems almost...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
BREAKING: Amid falling oil prices, Exxon forced to layoff several congressmen
Goldman Sachs said on Sunday that oil prices would continue to fall in the coming weeks due to a coronavirus-led...
Joe Biden wonders why he didn’t get any trick-or-treaters yesterday
Presummed Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden is heartbroken that he didn't get any trick-or-treaters at his house yesterday, Easter Sunday...
Wildlife reclaiming parks during lockdown: ‘The brontosauruses have quadrupled’
YOSEMITE NATIONAL PARK—Usually, when you drive through Yosemite Village, you have a tough time not running over gnarly rock climbers...
Fauci blames Trump for Fauci saying we don’t have to worry about coronavirus in January
Every day this Fauci guy kicks our President in the groin and keeps on smiling at the camera as if...
Amid COVID pandemic, nation’s hospitals request fewer ventilators and more cowbell
Nurse crews are absolutely killing it in their response to a Tik Tok dance challenge during the COVID-19 pandemic. The...
Xenophobia on the rise as angry white blood cells target ‘Chinese coronavirus’
In the wake of the deadly pandemic that has engulfed the world, an even deadlier pandemic is taking root within...
BREAKING: Jeffrey Epstein has died from coronavirus months after not killing himself
Months after the disgraced financier Jeffrey Epstein hung himself in his jail cell, he has died from coronavirus/COVID-19 in New...
Millions celebrate Christ defeating death forever by cowering in their houses afraid of a bad cold
Christians throughout the world celebrated the day that Jesus Christ overcame death in the Resurrection by cowering in their houses,...
New Hampshire changes motto to ‘Live Free or Save Me From a Cold’
New Hampshire has changed what was perhaps the most recognizable state mottos—"Live Free or Die"—to something slightly less catchy: "Live...
