Sweet Meteor O’Death surges in the polls after dismal presidential debate
CLEVELAND—The inanimate celestial body Sweet Meteor O'Death, which will be passing by Earth shortly before the US presidential election surged...
Joe Biden
Biden falls asleep while Trump argues with moderator during first debate
CLEVELAND—President Trump came out swinging in the first presidential debate of 2020 but focused most of his attention on the...
Biden accidentally brings wooden paddle to knife fight
The first 2020 Presidential debate is Tuesday, September 29 at 9, Eastern and the 'guys' just can't wait. President Trump...
Joe “Smash” Biden rejects pre-debate test: ‘no reason to suspect I take any drugs’
WILMINGTON, DE- Presidential candidate Joe Biden has refused to honor President Donald Trump's request for debate participants to take a...
BREAKING: Biden pulls out of debates unless they provide several nap breaks
CLEVELAND—US Presidential Candidate Joe Biden says he won't debate President Trump unless there are ample nap breaks during the grandest...
Biden switches VP from Kamala to pro ‘deal maker’ Wayne Brady
Presidential hopeful Joe Biden campaign officials confirmed the switch from Kamala Harris to Let's Make a Deal host, Wayne Brady....
BREAKING: Jill Biden arrested for elderly abuse
WILMINGTON, DE—After months of forcing her senior-citizen husband Joe Biden into the public spotlight despite his declining cognitive inabilities, Jill...
Biden says his white supremacy is okay because he ‘is black’
WORSCHESTER, PA—Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden says that his white supremacy is "okay" because he is black. "C'mon man! You...
Joe Biden pulls support for Ruth Bader Ginsburg memorial after learning ‘she ain’t black’
Though notorious RBG hasn't been put to ground as of this writing, mourners and hysterical Liberals have been descending on...
Emmys celebrate Black Lives Matter by setting all the white people on fire
INTERNET—Anthony Anderson, the star of “Black-ish,” made a statement in honor of black lives matter by setting host Jimmy Kimmel...
