BREAKING: Pfizer releases new vaccine to protect against the side effects of its COVID vaccine
ATLANTA—Scientists are amazed by the quick development of yet another new vaccine under Project Warp Speed. The new vaccine developed...
Health
Newsom makes first public appearance since getting booster shot
SACRAMENTO--Dispelling any rumors that the COVID vaccine booster shot that he received October 27 caused his absence from the public,...
Big Bird falls off stage, cancels all appearances following vaccination
US--Big Bird has cancelled all appearances after falling off stage following highly publicized vaccination. The eight-foot two-inch (249 cm) tall...
Man eaten by shark dies from white supremacy coronavirus
(CNN) CORONADO, CA—Evidence is beginning to mount that young and healthy people can contract COVID-19 and die from the horrifying...
CDC recommends 4th booster shot for those who haven’t died yet
ATLANTA—The Centers for Disease Control and Promotion (CDC) is now recommending a fourth COVID vaccine booster shot for all of...
FDA agrees to use children in deadly experiments instead of dogs
WASHINGTON, DC—Following outrage about Dr. Anthony Fauci's use of beagles in horrible experiments, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) has...
CNN: Fauci’s dog torture experiments were mostly peaceful
(CNN) The Republicans are leading another witch hunt against Dr. Anthony Fauci, who conducted mostly peaceful dog torture experiments while...
BREAKING: Biden adds Pfizer to US flag, Pledge of Allegiance
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Biden yesterday announced that he is adding Pfizer to the official US flag and the Pledge of Allegiance...
Bill Gates to constantly stroke a white cat to solidify his role as global supervillain
REDMOND, WA—Renowned tech and biotech mogul Bill Gates has decided he will carry around a white cat and stroke it...
