Local men dominate International Women’s Day 
BREAKING: Democrats unveil bold new ‘Peace is War’ campaign in support of endless Ukraine conflict 
AOC horrified terrorists are running over people with gas-powered cars instead of electric vehicles 
CNN: More cars mysteriously drive themselves into German pedestrians 
Bondi assures Americans: ‘Epstein files coming soon—just need to blot out all the Israeli connections first’ 
Zelenskyyy adds another ‘y’ to his name to become even more lovable than before
KYIV—Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyyy has added another 'y' to his name to become even more lovable than before, sources say....
Satire That’s Truer Than News
BREAKING: Local man creates time machine by moving clock forward 1 hour every morning
PLEASANTVILLE—Myron Slipnicks says he has traveled into the future simply by moving his clock ahead 1 hour every morning. He...
World’s most expensive whore makes largest donation in Planned Parenthood history
SEATTLE—The world's most expensive whore, MacKenzie Scott, has donated $275 million to the abortion mill nonprofit Planned Parenthood — the...
Local leftist swaps ‘Coexist’ bumper sticker with ‘Kill Every Russian NOW!’ sticker
US—A local leftist, Wankie McLittlejon, has finally switched his ‘Coexist’ bumper sticker to one that says ‘Kill Every Russian NOW!'...
Disney CEO Chapek promises at least 2 anal sex scenes in all kids’ movies from now on
VISTA DEL MAL, CA—In a town hall meeting today, Disney CEO Bob Chapek said the entertainment behemoth would put together...
SCOTUS nominee brings a biologist with her every time she goes to the bathroom to tell her which one to use
WASHINGTON, DC—Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson refused to define the word “woman” in her Supreme Court confirmation hearing Tuesday, asserting that...
SCOTUS pick Jackson declines to define ‘woman’ because she ‘never got to see Kindergarten Cop’
Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson and GOP Sen. Marsha Blackburn sparred over questions of sex and gender during the second day...
BREAKING: Hillary Clinton tests negative for being president, again
CHAPPAQUA, NY—Former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton tested negative for being president again, her spokeswoman stated in a brief briefing...
BREAKING: Psaki tests positive for COVID; will miss Biden’s false flag assassination in Europe
WASHINGTON, DC—White House Press Secretary Jen Psaki said she tested positive for COVID-19 Tuesday so she will not be joining President* Joe Biden...
China tests new ‘Kamikaze 737’ jet with 130 Uyghurs onboard as possible Muslim ‘final solution’
SOUTH CHINA—If you are one of 12 million Chinese Uyghurs and you win a free trip to Disneyland you might...
