Mitch McConnell Shatters Personal Record with 25-Hour Blank Stare, Inspired by Cory Booker’s Filibuster 
Cory Booker’s 17-Hour Education Filibuster Ends in Epic April Fools’ Prank: “I Had You All!” 
BREAKING: Pam Bondi releases all Epstein Files, announces arrest of all 366 of Epstein’s clients 
BREAKING: April Fool’s Day cancelled because reality is so ridiculous 
BREAKING: Scientists discover that chickens lay more eggs when you stop killing billions of them for no reason 
BREAKING: Thousands of Cubans protest against their great literacy program and free healthcare
HAVANA, CUBA—Thousands of Cubans took to the streets on Sunday in a number of cities to protest against their high...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
First biological cheetah who identifies as a woman set to take gold at Tokyo Olympics
TOKYO—The first ever biological cheetah who identifies as a woman is set to take gold at the Tokyo Olympics next...
Biden confirms that all door-to-door vaccine-checkers will be named Karen
WASHINGTON, DC—Providing more details for the unprecedented door-to-door vaccination checkers in his new COVID vaccine plan will be named Karen....
Cuomo to put armed violent felons in nursing homes to fight gun violence
ALBANY, NY—New York Governor Andrew Cuomo plans on killing 15,000 elderly people with gun violence in the next coming months...
My glasses won’t work unless you wear yours
I don't know who needs to hear this but everyone needs to wear glasses, even if they don't need them...
Collector who wants to buy Hunter Biden’s piece of sh*t for $500k wants to remain anonymous
LOS ANGELES, CA—Hunter Biden is preparing to sell several piles of his own feces at an upcoming art exhibition for as...
Biden bans ‘assault Legos’ after FBI finds Capitol set at Jan 6 rioter’s home
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Biden on Thursday announced a ban on assault Legos after the FBI revealed they had seized a “fully...
Delta+ now streaming! Act now and get Lambda Variant at no extra cost!
BURBANK, CA—The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) on Tuesday officially launched Delta+ variant of the COVID pandemic, its...
‘I have never but once prayed to God: O Lord, make my enemies ridiculous. And He granted it.’
I have some great quotes but this one is probably the best! "I have never made but one prayer to...
White House unveils uniforms for new door-to-door vaccine informants
WASHINGTON, DC--President* Joe Biden announced Tuesday that his administration would step up efforts to get Americans vaccinated against COVID-19 with a new...
