Local men dominate International Women’s Day 
BREAKING: Democrats unveil bold new ‘Peace is War’ campaign in support of endless Ukraine conflict 
AOC horrified terrorists are running over people with gas-powered cars instead of electric vehicles 
CNN: More cars mysteriously drive themselves into German pedestrians 
Bondi assures Americans: ‘Epstein files coming soon—just need to blot out all the Israeli connections first’ 
President Biden declares Eagles Superbowl LV Champs by executive order
WASHINGTON, DC—At 5AM Eastern Time today President-Elect Biden issued another executive order, declaring the Philadelphia Eagles the Super Bowl Champions...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
David Hogg launches MyPillow competition: MyDillow for small, mousy men
Parkland school shooting survivor and gun control advocate David Hogg plans to launch his own pillow company to compete with...
Fauci orders wall of masks built around all federal buildings
WASHINGTON, DC—Latest guidelines from the CDC require walls of N95 masks constructed around all buildings to keep the population safe...
Economist Paul Krugman suggests workers use only their left hand to boost employment
UNITED STATES—In today’s edition of the former newspaper New York Times Nobel Prize winning-economist Paul Krugman wrote an op-ed in...
BREAKING: AOC recalls barely making it out alive of Ewok siege on Endor base
FOREST MOON—A teary-eyed Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) on Monday recounted the horrifying events during the Ewok siege of the Galactic...
BREAKING: Democrats impeach Trump for unconstitutionally following the Constitution
WASHINGTON, DC—With President Trump’s impending impeachment trial approaching rapidly, legal and constitutional scholars from around the nation have been pondering...
BREAKING: Thousands of immigrants heading to US to become victims of systemic racism
McALLEN, TX—A migrant caravan from Africa and Central America is heading for the United States to become victims of the...
Disney releases new blockbuster: Ocacchio
NO BUENO VISTA, CA—Disney Corporation is capitalizing on the wonderful life of congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (also known as Alexandria Ocasio-Smollett)...
AOC: ‘I was almost just killed by an economics textbook’
NEW YORK CITY—Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) recounted today on Twitter a very disturbing experience she had recently. AOC said she...
BREAKING: Biden ends mass discussion about ‘Kids in cages’
THE BORDER—The great humanitarian Joe Biden has overturned the horrible Trump immigration policy of "kids in cages" that the Obama...
