BREAKING: Biden Sneaks in Pardon for Hunter During Annual Turkey Pardon Ceremony 
Farewell, X: Why I’m Leaving Over Their Refusal to Censor Me 
Bernie declares eating $6.2 million duct-taped bananas a human right to be paid for by government 
Jaguar introduces new car to match its new ad campaign 
BREAKING: I was raped by whoever Trump selects for one of his cabinet positions 
All 6 fans of the WNBA are infuriated players walked off the court during national anthem
The Seattle Storm and New York Liberty, walked off the court during the playing of the national anthem prior to...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
NYC proposes segregation by race in schools to promote racial unity
NEW YORK CITY--Mayor Bill De Blasio announced schools will be racially segregated if they every reopen in order to promote...
CNN apologizes for upcoming ‘technical difficulties’ whenever Biden speaks
ATLANTA—CNN has already purchased dozens of new cameras and TV equipment from the Chinese Communist Party in anticipation of the...
Fauci: ‘Face masks aren’t necessary if you put your hands like this’
WASHINGTON—Tippy top infectious disease expert and America's doctor, Dr. Anthony Fauci has released new guidelines for wearing masks in public...
Cuomo: ‘Pizza is a substantive food unless you put pineapple on it’
NEW YORK—Governor Andrew Cuomo, in a lengthy explanation of possibly the most arbitrary government mandate in the long history arbitrary...
Washington’s NFL franchise will now be called the ________ _____s so as not to offend anyone
Effective immediately, Washington will call itself the __________ _______s so as not to offend anyone. "We had a few ideas...
BLM rejects Marxism once they find out Karl Marx was an old white guy
By now every sentient being is well aware that Black Lives Matter has absolutely nothing to do with Black lives....
Having not found 5 righteous people in Chicago, Trump orders a surge of fire and brimstone
President Donald Trump, having not found even 5 righteous people in the city of Chicago, announced plans Wednesday to send...
Portland moms finally pick up their kids from their little Antifa protest
PORTLAND, OR--Moms from around Portland finally came to pick up their kids from their little Antifa protest at the federal...
Feminists protest National Hotdog Day in order to defeat the Patriarchy
CHICAGO—A group of 100 feminists marched defiantly outside Vienna Beef headquarters today, in order to protest national hotdog day, July...
