Jaguar introduces new car to match its new ad campaign 
BREAKING: I was raped by whoever Trump selects for one of his cabinet positions 
BREAKING: Elon Musk buys MSNBC to constantly air video of Alex Jones giving Morning Joe and Mika noogies 
CNN: Startled by Loud Noises, President Kennedy Trips and Falls in Limousine 
This Day In Mostly-Peaceful History: President Kennedy Goes Scenic Ride through Dallas 
MSNBC feminist panel outraged that Supreme Court Justice’s wives have opinions
In a shocking and bizarre turn of events, a panel of self-proclaimed "feminists" on MSNBC has called for the wives...
Satire That’s Truer Than News
JUST IN: Unbiased Merchan Jury Instruction: “Ignore Anything That Helps Trump”
NEW YORK—In a groundbreaking move that has left the legal world reeling, New York Judge Juan Merchan has issued a...
Creative Ways to Use Custom Fluorescent Signs in 2024
Remember those old, dusty motel signs buzzing with neon? While they hold a certain vintage charm, the lighting has gotten...
BREAKING: France eager to get into Ukraine-Russia war so that they can surrender to someone soon
PARIS—France has announced that it is eager to join the ongoing conflict between Ukraine and Russia, expressing a fervent desire...
BREAKING: Robert de Niro claims Trump raped him back in the ’90s too
NEW YORK—In a shocking and bizarre turn of events, legendary actor Robert de Niro has accused former President Donald Trump...
BREAKING: Trump announces Baron Trump as his VP pick
In a move that has left political analysts scrambling and late-night comedians rejoicing, former President Donald Trump announced today that...
Biden celebrates Memorial Day by thanking all the dead Civil War veterans who will vote for him in November
WASHINGTON, DC—In a touching and heartfelt display of patriotism, President Joe Biden celebrated Memorial Day this year by thanking all...
EXCLUSIVE: George Floyd celebrates 4 years of sobriety
MINNEAPOLIS, MN—George Floyd, patron saint of fentanyl, celebrated four consecutive drug-free years today. Mr. Floyd famously quit taking drugs following his...
Amid skyrocketing inflation, Joe Biden recommends Americans ‘stop being so poor’
WASHINGTON, DC—In a stunning display of forward-thinking leadership, President Joe Biden has unveiled a groundbreaking new plan to tackle the...
MEMORIAL DAY: Nation mourns George Floyd who died when his spaceship exploded in 2020
US—This Memorial Day, the nation is mourning NASA legend George Floyd who died two years ago when his spaceship exploded...
