Biden Reveals He’s ‘Lack Toast and Tolerant’
WASHINGTON, DC—President Biden revealed today that he only drinks lactaid milk because he’s “lack toast and tolerant.” “I’m lack toast...
Joe Biden
BREAKING: Leaking documents is bad again
(CNN) In a stunning reversal of opinion, politicians and media figures are now decrying the practice of leaking documents, after...
BREAKING: Biden vows to punish whoever released illegal leaks all over the White House
In a statement released today, the Biden administration has vowed to find and punish whoever is responsible for repeatedly releasing...
BREAKING: 51 intelligence agents who lied about Hunter Biden laptop sentenced to zero years in prison for election interference
In a stunning turn of events, the 51 ex-intelligence agents who falsely claimed that Hunter Biden's laptop was Russian disinformation...
BREAKING: Biden to confiscate all Americans’ guns to give them to Ukraine
Washington D.C. - In a shocking move that has left gun rights advocates reeling, President Joe Biden has announced that...
Biden calls for national day of mourning for trans person who was viciously misgendered after mostly peacefully killing some people
(CNN) WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has announced that he will be calling for a national day of mourning for Audrey...
BREAKING: In response to Biden’s illegal business deal with China, DOJ to arrest Donald Trump
WASHINGTON, DC—In response to new revelations of illegal business dealings with China, The Department of Justice have issued an arrest...
Biden to burn $100 bills at fireside chats to lower energy costs
WASHINGTON, DC—President* Joe Biden has announced that he will begin burning $100 bills in his fireside chats as a way...
How to get that perfect selfie during the coming global thermonuclear war
In the age of social media, getting the perfect selfie has become a top priority for many people. But what...
BREAKING: President Biden Accidentally Locks Himself in Oval Office, Can’t Find Key
WASHINGTON, DC—CNN reports that President Biden accidentally locked himself in the Oval Office and couldn’t remember where he put the...
